Conquering Bad Boys in the Steak Indoors

With Summer fast approaching and the promise of mini-shorts baring all sorts of visual reminders of dairy products on the shanks of those jostling around me, it is with slight guilt that I foist my not-so-secret carnivore confession upon you at this time. However, as most of my winter was spent celebrating the wonder that is the steak indoors (much to the sooty-faced chagrin of The Boys), I figured it was time I came clean about how it was that I conquered the bad boy in the Steak Indoors.

Wherever you fall on the Grass v. Corn debate, the steak should be firm and fresh. Not stinky and definitely not mushy. Thin ribbons of what I call glorious-gravy-to-be white fat should lace delicately throughout the steak. Do not like the raw steak yet. I went with a Beef T-Bone.

After washing and patting it fanatically dry (this is key!), promiscuously season the steak with lots of gravelly salt but pepper to your heart's desire. Take your time in massaging your drooly faced wishes into the steak at this point because the cast iron skillet should have plenty of time to gain such furious heat that the smoke alone will excise even the most indoor-bound roommates. Like fog rolling around the Bay Bridge, once a constant fury of smoke has built up around your skillet, slap the steak in and then grasp that nearby glass of red wine with white-knuckled desperation(have really been enjoying Terranoble as described here).

Resist, even ignore, the steak like a bad boy giving you the lazy eye at closing time. Be the pacifist, touching it only to flip once. Feign a haughty disdain for it as it is dangerous at this point to lick the caramelly crust shimmering seductively face-up in the skillet. When the time is up, the ultimate self-less (for now) act is to let it wait 5 minutes to become the juicy paradise of your deepest, hottest fantasies before you start slicing.

With or without a separate plate, devour the steak drenched in the meaty seduction sauce of all things naughty and carnal. For this is one bad boy that makes an even better hot dish.